First up.
I have been awakened by a secretary calling me to work.
I love this one's voice.
A voice softer than my grandmother's who died many years ago.
I have to tell her no, since I'm already subbing.
I wonder if my alarm has already gone off.
It has.
I take my shirt to be pressed down to the laundry room.
Already a song is hitting me.
My head has natural reverb.
Great Hall.
I make a protein shake as the iron is warming and the coffee is brewing.
I go take my shower and shave.
I try to wake my babies, one by one.
My daughter cries that she won't get up.
I hold her till she says she's ready to brush out her hair.
My oldest son says he showered last night.
His little brother only wants to curl up in my arms.
Knotted hair and tears from the bathroom.
I do my best to help.
My best is usually good enough.
It all works out...
I drop my kids off at their house.
I wish I had time to actually take them to school.
Not today.
I have to go by the mechanic's and drop of my keys.
My car is being towed there today.
I can only hope that it isn't a huge repair.
I make it to school with time to spare.
The secretary has my paperwork ready for me to sign as usual.
Secretaries probably don't get paid enough for their excellence.
I find that I have many, many copies to make.
No matter.
It's all a part of the job, and I'm glad to be part of it all.
Everything is in order when the first of my first graders hit the class.
Here we go.
It all works out...
I ask if they usually say the Pledge of Allegiance.
No.
They usually do not.
Okay.
Well, we're going to do it anyway.
I'm sure someone died today in a foreign land for that flag.
We can take one minute and say the Pledge.
The subjects come and go.
Nothing troubling.
Lots of tattling.
Nothing troubling.
I can't find blank transparencies.
I use chalk on the blackboard.
Old School.
I smile and laugh to myself.
I send and receive texts in my free time.
Messages to and from friends that I love.
Love that is old and deep.
Friends that are old that hold love for me that steeps.
People need other people.
Encouragement never gets old.
I love it all.
It all works out...
I am the stalwart sentry in the hall.
Mr. Cook with the soft heart but stern stare.
I know I am loved.
Still, I am there to provide structure.
I usher mine into the gym.
They are there to see weird animals.
I am there to see that they sit criss-cross applesauce, hips and lips.
Shhhh!
Bottom on the floor!
Under my breath and under my brow, all of it.
I get to pet the animals.
Ooos and ahhhs, giggles and pointed fingers.
I have always known how to play the part.
It's for the good of the pack.
But it warms my heart.
You must always find something to warm your heart.
Your heart has every chance to die.
You must never let that happen.
It all works out...
I run here and there, errands for the sake of errands.
I drive back home to pack up my children's clothes.
Their world in a bag, my heart in their every look.
I deliver and hug them all.
My oldest son jumps in our borrowed van.
We go to his weekly baseball coaching.
He loves it, loves it, loves it.
I love him, so I love it too.
I talk with one of my best friends about love and life.
It's our weekly pep talk to each other.
People need other people.
Encouragement never gets old.
I find out my car repair will cost $600.
Not the news I wanted to hear.
It could be worse.
And encouragement never gets old.
It all works out...
I take my boyo to the restaurant where I work at night.
It's our usual Monday haunt.
He knows most of the staff.
He knows I consider them all family.
He's quite the gentleman too.
I am so proud of him.
He is me, if I was cool.
He is my hero.
In almost seven years he'll be the one old enough to die on foreign soil.
Time will fly too fast.
He orders a steak.
He turns eleven this summer.
I smile and laugh with him.
I have to talk to him about his grades.
His report card was not good.
I tell him I have to ground him from his video games.
I hate it.
I know they keep him safe and give him comfort.
I know they are his escape from a world that crashed around him almost two years ago.
I know he did not ask for it.
So, I hate doing this to him.
But I do it with a tender smile and with as much explanation as a ten year old will buy.
He orders a steak.
He turns eleven this summer.
I smile and laugh with him.
I have to talk to him about his grades.
His report card was not good.
I tell him I have to ground him from his video games.
I hate it.
I know they keep him safe and give him comfort.
I know they are his escape from a world that crashed around him almost two years ago.
I know he did not ask for it.
So, I hate doing this to him.
But I do it with a tender smile and with as much explanation as a ten year old will buy.
He's okay with it.
It all works out...
I take him home.
His house is upside down.
His younger siblings drag out too many toys.
The upstairs ends up downstairs.
It all ends up being chewed up by the dogs.
It's a little much for their mother.
My oldest daughter is escaping it all in the dining room.
She sits doing homework with headphones on.
I remember doing the same thing at my house.
There weren't any animals at my house.
My son has lost his iPod.
He swears it fell in the couch.
His mother starts to come unglued.
She marches upstairs.
I flip the couch over and carefully slit the lining underneath.
I reach in and find it.
It all works out...
I take him home.
His house is upside down.
His younger siblings drag out too many toys.
The upstairs ends up downstairs.
It all ends up being chewed up by the dogs.
It's a little much for their mother.
My oldest daughter is escaping it all in the dining room.
She sits doing homework with headphones on.
I remember doing the same thing at my house.
There weren't any animals at my house.
My son has lost his iPod.
He swears it fell in the couch.
His mother starts to come unglued.
She marches upstairs.
I flip the couch over and carefully slit the lining underneath.
I reach in and find it.
The younger children start pulling out treasures from where the couch was.
Treasures amongst dust bunnies from hell.
I gently hand the iPod to my son.
She returns.
He gently hands it over to us.
At first she doesn't understand his gesture.
I explain that he is surrendering it, because he is grounded.
She turns to a vacuum cleaner and starts to unwind the cord.
I know she was doing homework when I came in.
I gently hand the iPod to my son.
She returns.
He gently hands it over to us.
At first she doesn't understand his gesture.
I explain that he is surrendering it, because he is grounded.
She turns to a vacuum cleaner and starts to unwind the cord.
I know she was doing homework when I came in.
I know she is bothered by the revealed mess under the couch.
I tell her that cleaning can wait.
I tell her I know she has work to do.
I hug her.
She begins to sob.
I tell her that she'll make it.
People need other people.
Encouragement never gets old.
I know school is hard, and she's almost done.
It's affecting them all.
I can only do what I can do.
It's not my home.
It will all work out...
I go to my favorite local bar.
Just like the television show, they all know my name.
I have a drink.
There is a great live DVD being played.
The proprietor tells me that our side project will soon be under way.
He is having a bass built for me to play.
No doubt that it will be interesting.
Extremely fun, but interesting.
I tell her that she'll make it.
People need other people.
Encouragement never gets old.
I know school is hard, and she's almost done.
It's affecting them all.
I can only do what I can do.
It's not my home.
It will all work out...
I go to my favorite local bar.
Just like the television show, they all know my name.
I have a drink.
There is a great live DVD being played.
The proprietor tells me that our side project will soon be under way.
He is having a bass built for me to play.
No doubt that it will be interesting.
Extremely fun, but interesting.
We've spent many evenings discussing music over a dark brew or two.
Or three.
Or four.
Closing time comes and goes, and those discussions never grow old.
But that's what two busted up music vets do.
It really does come to this.
At the present, he has to throw two people out of the bar.
I begin conversing with a wonderful person by text.
I post on facebook.
A world outside of my world where I talk about my world.
I think I would have benefited from such an outlet as an adolescent.
Police officers enter the bar.
They have received a call that patrons were just asked to leave by gunpoint.
Another patron flexes and asks if they were referring to his guns.
I laugh again.
I continue my text conversation.
I buy another drink.
I know I won't finish it.
I just don't feel like it.
Not tonight.
The day has been a strange one.
I want to go home.
I want to write.
I go out to the van.
I get inside and start playing Counting Crows on my phone.
I text my friend and tell her.
She says she loves Counting Crows.
I smile.
I laugh.
I love this life.
"I'm under the gun, round here..."
People need other people.
Encouragement never gets old.
It all works out...
Sometimes I just need a little while to figure out how to work it out.
I begin conversing with a wonderful person by text.
I post on facebook.
A world outside of my world where I talk about my world.
I think I would have benefited from such an outlet as an adolescent.
Police officers enter the bar.
They have received a call that patrons were just asked to leave by gunpoint.
Another patron flexes and asks if they were referring to his guns.
I laugh again.
I continue my text conversation.
I buy another drink.
I know I won't finish it.
I just don't feel like it.
Not tonight.
The day has been a strange one.
I want to go home.
I want to write.
I go out to the van.
I get inside and start playing Counting Crows on my phone.
I text my friend and tell her.
She says she loves Counting Crows.
I smile.
I laugh.
I love this life.
"I'm under the gun, round here..."
People need other people.
Encouragement never gets old.
It all works out...
Sometimes I just need a little while to figure out how to work it out.
