I am the Phoenix

I was dead but
I am still aware
I am careful to consider
I am full of emotion
I will rise again today
I was empty but
I am alive with desire
I am stored up with passion
I am willing to wait
I will win a smile today
I was the sacrifice but
I am reassembling
I am reconstituting
I am reconstructing
I will be of clear mind and conscience
I was fearful of new feelings
I am now firm in what I want
I am brimming full in my heart
I am ready for today
I am ready to see new beauty
I am ready to taste new love
I am ready to hear new whispers
I am ready to touch a new kindness
I am ready now
I am ready for today
I am the phoenix

Road Trip into the Sun

This a road long ago traveled
Maybe completely unknown
It is hard to tell
Hard to see
Surely there are markers
But in this blur unseen
Speeding and speeding and speeding
Where there were torrents of rain
Now the sun is too bright
The weather almost too fair
Am I hopelessly open?
Too purposefully unguarded?
Earnest and willing?
Speeding and speeding and speeding
I just feel like exploding though!
It is so difficult to explain
A puffed up searing in my chest
The thought of touching something
So illuminated in perpetuity
How can I possibly slow down?
But was not common sense
Made for times like this?
Yet did I ever or have I ever
Really ever subscribed to that?
Spontaneity and a robust desire
Have never served ill my
Honest and hopeful intentions
But there is that floating fear
That pervades throughout my mind
That intercepts and tries to derail
My most minute attempts at happiness
That fear that leaves me considering that
All of this...
Every fine porcelain facet of this
Is nothing more than an
Evanescent dream
Something that I was not meant to have
Something meant for someone else
Of which I will never be worthy
A fear I will never set foot
Out of this wilderness
But it just cannot be!
As much as I fear it
Even so much greater
Is my adamant denial of that fear
So much so that I know
Deep down in my heart
That there is a possibility
There is the chance
However small
However unlikely
That I might touch this light
Bathe in its warmth
Even if I risk burning alive
Just to give back...
To give all of what I am...
Unashamed
Unrestricted
Uninhibited
With no concern of
Mutual exchange
Just knowing that
I am making a difference
Knowing that I am bringing
Joy and happiness
To another
In my mind it is an abolute
So undeniably worth it
Speeding and speeding and speeding
Just to make it in time
To be able to once again say
I love you.

Pause and Apprehension

I can smell it...
I can almost feel it...
I know it is there
A new breeze
Though faint I know it is there
Because I have heard its voice
I have heard its song
And I just keep waiting and waiting
And the candles are burning down
And fear is creeping around my mind
And that fear has only stolen aboard
By way of an older and less promising
Harsh wind of the past
Guiltless and remorseless
A wind that was full of promises
But turned everything barren
In its wake and is now rearing
Its face once again
Selfishness in spite of my pain
And so now I am here
Almost in the dark
Trying so desperately
To shield myself
Trying so hard
To keep the door open
For just a bit longer
Just a few moments longer
Hoping and waiting
Waiting and hoping
That the new breeze
Has not disappeared
But will return
To scatter the dark
To open up the sky
To bring change
To tell me it will be alright
To save me

The Wind and the Gray

Some mention of loss
Vague and off to the side
Silent and lithe
So dear to my sight
Foot fall and stop
Broken lips more than not
A sad picture says all
But that’s not what I see

They may see
What did never mend
They may tell
Of what they heard and then
They may propose
The sordid rumored end
They may all serve
Themselves forever ill

Simple wind
Simple gray
Unmistakable smell of a
Summer rain
I can’t tell
What I believe
But you are here
And I see
Simple lines
Simple means
Unmistakable fear of a
Friend in need
So I can’t tell
You what to believe
But you are here
And I see

The stress of why
And how it all comes down
The questions mount
You say to yourself that it all just doesn't make
Sense and senses you start to doubt
Yourself and all you’re scared to allow
To happen how it may oh dear just let
What might be just natural play out

I don’t see
What did never mend
You told me all
I need to know and then
I may propose
A very different end
Different from them
Different from him

Simple wind
Simple gray
Unmistakable smell of a
Summer rain
I can’t tell
What I believe
But you are here
And I see
Simple lines
Simple means
Unmistakable fear of a
Friend in need
So I can’t tell
You what to believe
But you are here
And I see

Wind and the Gray - DGC 10/31/09

Was

Finally home and it's all finished
I look back for love of fiction I wish
That somewhere back there I don't know when
Maybe what if we had waited, you know who's to say
The brighter side could've taken hold
Maybe obliterate the thought of being old
It's hard now, so hard now
Good and evil both farewell

Time doesn't exist for me
Forgotten gone away I'll envy
For what I am known for what I will be
Means absolutely nothing
Absolutely nothing

Late summer trip out East
I really, really wanted to believe
The air was different, the sun was different
We were both there and it didn't make a difference
That three days went by so fast
And the next three years were a blinding crash
This star has died sucking in the dreams
Now my course has changed and what was has ceased

Time doesn't exist for me
Forgotten gone away I'll envy
For what I am known for what I will be
Means absolutely nothing
Absolutely nothing

I will push further and further
This will break cleaner and faster
I will wait for another
I alone will shake this disaster

DGC 1998

Whenever I Fall

Washing cycle carries on
The candles have all gone to bed
Sitting criss-cross on the floor
And I am thinking about a friendly voice
No expectation to lasso the moon
I do not even know what time it is
Staring at a shadow that will not move
And I am thinking about a friendly voice
The carpet tells no tale of running feet
The refrigerator echos near empty
Small voices remember me from across the town
And I am thinking about a friendly voice
I know the rain will bite and gnaw
I know time is green-eyed and chasing me
How strange the new now I miss the most
And I'm dreaming of a friendly voice

"Lolo Sang" by Ida

All the time we spent running
From the war, from the deluge
I was sure that I would see you
Once again, once again
Didn’t know if you were looking
For a highway or a room
Or the promise of some refuge
Or a good friend to help you though
Oh the days are getting shorter
And the wild flowers take the wind
And I hear the night birds singing
Will I see your face again?
Long ago on an island
Where the rice fields meet the sky
Lolo drank with his brothers
Played guitar, sang and cried
All this time I was searching
For a home I could not see
I just knew I didn’t belong here
Then you finally came to me
Oh my babe I truly love you
More than these words could ever say
And I know we’re just passing through here
But there’s no place I’d rather stay

Late Blues

if i get lost along the way to meet you
if i'm more than a little late
if i get caught up in circles chasing my own tail
if i trip up and fail you
if i let you down
if i let you down

i can see that injury that accompanies the passage of years
i can try to rationalize the accumulation of fears
and the dreams that draw a song in pursuit of the end of time
and the grace that illuminates the path
if i let you down
if i let you down

in the night the city's quiet
from the rooftop we can see the moon rise high above the clouds
just enough light to see our faces give expression to the words we thought but didn't speak
and then you asked me a question that i won't forget
even if i spend my life trying to live up to what it means
if i let you down
if i let you down

don't let it break down
don't let it break down

Late Blues ~ ida (2008)

After Dinner

Elena: Mommy? Why do we say, "May I be Ets-stused?"
Emily: Well, that's what we say when we're polite.
Rohan: That's what fancy people say, and eventually, I will become fancy.
Emily: Rohan, you're adorable.
Elena: Rohan, someday a hot durl is dowing to marry you!

I am the Rain King

Wow...I'm worn out, but I thank God for the energy I seem to have in reserve. I've been so happy that I've been able to squeeze in workouts the last two nights. Hopefully I can keep it up. With the chiropractic and massage visits a couple times a week, the hip is starting to come around enough that I've been able to do these workouts. Not to dismiss all of the stretching and heat and cold treatments that I do about three times a day. We'll see what happens Friday. I'm supposed to go skate and hit a couple local skateparks with my old friend, Kevin Bearden before we run up to St. Louis to see the Counting Crows. We haven't hung out together in almost twenty years. I'm really excited about seeing them, because it will be my first time. Yeah, I know. Actually, Kevin and some other friends camped out for tickets back in '92 or '93, and for some reason I skipped out on the whole deal. Finally, after all these years I'm going to make up for it. What's funny is that the last time that I went skating with Kevin and my buddies and then went to see a concert was when we saw Poison in Cape Girardeu in '90. Brittney Fox opened. Rich, huh? Let's see...then the Fourth is the next day with some grilling out. Then I'm singing at church on Sunday, so I won't be screaming Friday night along with the masses under the Arch. Hopefully my body will stay together so I can start painting trim next week.

The cuteness of Elena continues...

I'm in the dining room working on some tabs, and Elena comes in and says that she's "humbry." As much as I love that word, I correct her and ask her to politely ask for something to eat. I then get her a Lunchable out of the fridge, unpack it, and hand it to her. She asks, "Am I going to eat this in the living room?" I say, "Sure, just be careful." She then smiles and roles her eyes and replies, "This is going to be sooooo insane!"

Another Elena-ism

Elena: Daddy do you want to see what I drawed?

Daddy: Sure.

Elena: See?!

Daddy: Oh! That's wonderful!

Elena: Do you want to see what Allie drawed!

Daddy: Sure.

Elena: See?!

Daddy: That's great! Hey, do you know how we say that? We say, "drew." So, I draw my picture, but I drew it yesterday. So, see what I can draw? See what I just drew? So, can you say drew? Say drew.

Elena: Drooled!

Daddy: Umm...yeah, good job.

Summer Is Here

I know if I told a story about finding a penny, someone could tell one about finding a quarter, but for me, the penny is enough. Having said that, our summer is shaping up to be quite busy, and I'm hoping that we can find a groove and settle into it.

Rohan and Elena start tennis tomorrow which lasts until late July. Elena's age group starts at 8 a.m. and goes until 10 a.m., which is when Rohan's begins and his goes until noon. The question that I have, which will be answered tomorrow, is will I be able to take Rohan early and can Elena stay late? The latter I seriously doubt. I can't imagine someone being there to supervise four year olds away from the lessons.

Rohan also begins baseball camp tomorrow. He has to register at the same time Elena is registering. I just informed Emily that there's no way I can be in two places at the same time. I think she agreed to take Elena, and then turned off her nightstand light and rolled over. His baseball camp only lasts for three days though. Also, Allie starts a three day pom-pon clinic this week, which I think may go from 1 until 4 p.m. That shouldn't be too bad. Rohan has a couple games this week as well, but of course they're in the evening. It's crazy to think that his season is almost at the halfway make. Only about three more weeks I think.

The craziness will set in next week when my classes begin. I have to leave soon after 10 a.m. to be able to get to Carbondale and make it into class by 11 a.m. My last of two classes lets out by 1 p.m., so that at least isn't too bad. However, I'll be depending on my dad to get the kids back and forth to whatever they're doing. During that week, Rohan starts a four day basketball camp. Just like the baseball camp, it ends when he's supposed to be starting his tennis session. We'll just have to see how my dad holds up to the pressure.

On top of all of this, Rohan has started going to Hit Repair for pitching and hitting instruction from Cory Baily and Bob Simpson. It's only once a week and so far he loves it. He's got a heck of a lot more confidence than I did as a child. As long as he likes what he's doing, we're all for it.

Allie will only have one more pom camp later in July, which will be an all day affair for one week. So in comparison, her summer load is pretty light. If only she were sixteen and had a license, she could be running some of the kids around. Ah, but day will come, and probably too soon.

Through all of this, Emily is starting up classes too, as well as still working crazy hours. I only pray that she continues to keep her sanity as I try to keep mine. I think we're going to live for the first two weeks in August, when neither of us have classes and the kids won't be doing anything. Maybe we can all go on a family getaway for one weekend.

Somewhere in all of that we need to fit in potty training, VBS, getting the house repaired, getting Elena back into violin lessons, and plain living. Hmm. It's all relative I guess. Next summer will be busier, I suppose, and the next even moreso, and so on. I do hope that I'm never too busy to stop and reflect on how blessed we are. It is all so very wonderful.

Bathtime: as Heard from My Bed

Elena: “Oh, Mom!”
Riddick: “Mim!”
Em: “What?”
Riddick: “Mim!”
Elena: “Oh, Mom!”
Em: “What honey!”
Elena: “Oh, I fordot to pee adin!”
Em: “Well, that’s okay…”
Riddick: “Mim!”
Em: “It looks like your brother did too…”
Riddick: “O’no!”
Elena: “OOOOO!”
Em: “Don’t worry about it”
Riddick: “Mim!”
Em: “What?”
Riddick: “I’ha!”
Elena: “Mom!”
Em: “What’s hot?”
Riddick: “I’ha!”
Em: “Yes, the water’s hot…”
Elena: “Mom!”
Em: “What honey?!”
Elena: “His butt!”
Riddick: “Mim!”
Em: “What?”
Riddick: “Poop tum out?”
Em: “Yes, that’s where your poop comes out but you don’t want to touch it, you just need to wash it.”
Riddick: “Poop tum out!”
Em: “Get your finger out of your butt!”
Elena: “Mom!”
Em: “Here…”
Elena: “Mom!”
Em: “What? Hey! Leave your pee-pee alone!”
Elena: “OOOOOO! He peed!”
Em: “He did not pee!”
Elena: “OOOOOO!”
Em: “He peed when he got in like you did!”
Riddick: “Boohoohoohoo!”
Em: “Hang on! You’re almost done!”
Elena: “Mom.”
Riddick: “BWAAAAAH!”
Em: “What?”
Elena: “Look!”
Em: “Uh, huh.”
Elena: “I did it myself!”
Em: “Mmm-hmm.”
Riddick: “Mim!!!”
Em: “What, honey?”
Riddick: “No-nut!”
Em: “Yes, that’s a donut.”
Riddick: “No-nut!”
Em: “Alright, you’re done. Come on, let’s go see your dad…Elena, please stop!”
Elena: “Am I all clean?”
Em: “No, you still have to wash your hair.”
Riddick:”H-d-d-d-d-d…”
Em: “Here….here’s your Dad.”
Riddick: “Dahdeee!”
Me: “Hi, Riddick!”
Riddick: “Aaahhssheeewwww!”
Me: “Thanks for sneezing on me Riddick.”
Riddick: “Dahdeeee!”
Me: “What Riddick?”
Riddick: “Dah boo boo?”
Me: “No, that’s my belly button.”
Elena: “Mom!”
Em: “What Elena?”
Elena: “I’m washing my pony’s hair.”
Riddick: “Dah boo boo?”
Me: “No honey, that’s my belly button.”
Riddick: “Oh. Dah baby?”
Me: “Ah, no.”
Riddick: “Dah baby!”
Me: “Ah, yes…that my booby.”
Elena: “Mom! I dot a red butt!”
Em: “No, you’re fine.”
Riddick: “Wobwobwobwobwob” (with a toy cup placed to his mouth)
Em: “Alright, that’s it”
Elena: “NOOOO!”
Riddick: “Wobwobwobwobwob”
Em: “Come on”
Elena: “NOOOO! I forgot to wash her hair!”
Em: “It’ll be fine.”
Elena: “No it won’t be fine!”
Em: “Come on.”
Elena: “No it won’t be fine!”
Em: “Do we yell like that?”
Elena: “AAAA!”
Em: “Come on.”
Elena: “AAAAA!”
Em: “Let’s go.”
Elena: “Mom.”
Em: “What?”
Elena: “I dot duh wahder in my mouth and I spit it out!”
Em: “Well, we don’t spit water on the floor.”
Elena: “But dat’s duh spit take!”
Em: “Well, we don’t do that.”
Elena: “But I, Tarly does it!”
Em: “Well, we don’t. Now let’s go to bed.”
Elena: “Rot an Roll!!!”

JOURNAL ENTRY 04/28/09 - Thirty-Five and Going to School

Sometimes I write things on my laptop when on occasion I don't have my journal with me. I just came across this tonight, as I was cleaning up some directories. It's pretty recent and meaningful to me personally, so I thought I'd go ahead and post it here.

I was at the point of utter exhaustion. I had not slept the night before and had only three hours from the night before that. My limbs did not feel as though they were my own. As I sat down just minutes before, a feeling of extreme sadness came over me. I thought, “I have been to this library dozens of times, but now it is ruined because I brought my children here just once. For now as I sit here alone, I realize that I do not hear my children’s laughter. In such a state I reluctantly opened my backpack to retrieve two binders that were returned to me about half an hour before by my instructor. One was my resource file, and the other was my book summaries. I slowly opened my resource file first, looking for a foreign article of paper that would show my grade to me. It was red, and on it was written the letter A. This came as a pleasant surprise. At least it would in some way counter the dismal grade I would receive for my book summaries. I then very carefully opened the second binder. Taped to the inside cover was the page with the genre matrix. On it was written the letter A in red ink in a red cloud. I missed two out of one hundred and sixty, which calculated to ninety-nine percent. My instructor wrote, “Well organized! You have created a great resource for your classroom! Your well written summaries & varied activities will make this a priceless tool in your class! =)” Attached was a red certificate with a squirrel smiling beside an apple which read, “The BIG RED APPLE DIPLOMA is presented to Derek Cook”, dated and signed. I began to shake with sobs starting to gestate deep within me. I covered my mouth to suppress any sound that might try to be birthed. I controlled myself and looked through the window on my left and out at the exterior window in the lobby, covered in millions of droplets of rain. It was such a wet day, and I was exhausted. I really missed my babies.

Riddick Has Shed the Penguin!

Today was a much better day for Riddick, praise the Lord! He is not on oxygen anymore and is doing very well for a two-year-old that has basically laid in the same position for over 36 hours. He ate a little more today than he did yesterday, but that really isn't saying much considering how little he ate. However, Emily is not worried about it, so I trust her judgement. Really, the only problem he had all day, or so it seemed during my watches, was that he constantly crimped his IV by accident. This would set off a beeping alarm that had to be reset by staff. This got old after a while, but other than the slight annoyance, it did him no harm. Finally, when Emily arrived this evening she redid the way it ran up his arm and fixed the problem. Elena got to spend the morning with him before we went to her pre-K to kindergarten celebration, and then she along with Allie and Rohan got to watch a movie with him this evening before we left. We didn't make a big deal out of goodbyes and just quietly left the room. I talked to Emily this evening, and she said that she had given him a bath, and he was happily playing with toys. She wanted to spend the night with him again, and I know that at the end of the day, it's the mommy that matters most. We're really optimistic that he will be able to come home tomorrow, and I can't wait to see him run around the house again.

I do want to thank everyone for all of the prayers, the visits, the well wishes, and gifts for Riddick. They have meant a lot to us, and you've made his stay away from home much more comfortable than you'll ever know. We love all of you, and God bless!

Riddick in the Hospital

I hated leaving Riddick tonight. Emily is with him, but he is still too young to understand why he has to stay there, and why his Daddy, brother and sisters left him. He hates having his oxygen mask on, so that is the real reason why he worked himself up into a crying fit. Then we had to leave, because I needed to get the other kids home to do homework and go to bed. That's when he started calling my name and reaching for me. I picked him up, and I guess he thought he was going to go with us, because he started to tug at his IV. Emily took him and sat back down on the bed. Then he started calling for Allie and Rohan. He was just screaming. It was heart-wrenching to leave. I hate it. It'll be my turn to stay tomorrow night if he has to stay another night. I pray that he doesn't and that he gets to come home. At least they have officially diagnosed this as an asthma attack, so he can start being treated. For the last year he has had these attacks almost every five to six weeks, and they either say that it's seasonal allergies or pneumonia. Now he'll begin to use a steroid inhaler to hopefully stave off these episodes. I just pray that he gets some sleep tonight and that his O2 levels return to normal.

The Storm

Things are finally getting back to normal around our house after dealing with the storm that was oddly tagged an inland hurricane, or derecho storm, depending on which side of the proverbial storm fence you're sitting on. There were gusts of wind with speeds of over 100 mph recorded, and the wind was sustained for well over half an hour. It's hard to find official reports, but those figures are conservatively based on what I've been reading online through blogs and local news agencies. In other words, a lot of wind for a long amount of time causing a lot of damage.

When the storm hit, Emily was at JALC, Rohan and Allie were at school, and I was home with Elena and Riddick. When the first part of the system came through, the storm sirens went off a couple of times, but like most storms that pass through, it's kind of like the boy who cried wolf. I think a lot of us that remember the tornado from '82 almost feel rather indifferent to storms in general, like we've been there and done that. So, after listening to some reports on W3D, and after the sirens ceased, I decided to put Riddick down for a nap. I also crashed for a short nap while Elena watched a movie. I awoke a short time later to the sounds of wind moreso than any sirens. Come to think of it, I have no recollection of any more sirens. All I could hear was wind. The door to our sleeper porch was open, and I could see the tops of all of the trees just flapping violently about like you see in hurricane video clips. Then I saw a very large branch fly through the air in perfect horizontal plane. That's when I new that things were definitely much worse than I had presumed. I quickly put on my sandals, and shouted for Elena to go the basement. She didn't really like the idea, because it was dark. I don't think it had registered with me yet that there was no power. I was still just aware of the sound of wind everywhere. Now mind you, I had no idea that this was a constant wave of wind. Around here the worst case scenario is a tornado, so that is what I thought was happening. I grabbed Riddick from his bed (which shocked the poor guy, because he was in a deep sleep), ran downstairs, and rushed the two kids down to the basement. I quickly opened up some lawn chairs for the kids to sit in and told them to sit tight while I ran back upstairs to get some stuff.

I knew that if things got really bad, as in our house being hit by a tornado, I wanted to be in pants and work boots and not shorts and sandals. For all I knew, I might have had to tear through wreckage to get my children out alive. I ran upstairs and stopped in the kitchen to look out of our breakfast nook windows just to see if I could see anything. I noticed that our neighbor's trellis had blown over across our sidewalk near our garage. I was just thinking about how that was a shame when our white vinyl fence panel exploded and disappeared. I didn't realize that I had just witnessed our neighbor Dale's tree coming down. I was certain that that was it --a tornado was upon us. I sprinted up the stairs, grabbed some jeans and my boots, and bolted back to the basement. I dropped the clothes to the floor, picked up my kids, sat down with them on my lap, and started praying out loud. I'm not for sure how much time passed before I decided to go check things out...probably about fifteen or twenty minutes, at least. Once again, I sat the kids in their chairs and then went upstairs to observe what might be seen. It wasn't long before I discovered that Dale's tree had fallen parallel with our house, blocking our back door. I also found that that our tree to the east had fallen against our neighbor Steve's house. I then ran up to my room to get a bird's eye view of what had happened, and like every idiot out there, I grabbed my camera. I filmed a very short video clip in which you can tell that my emotions were somewhat frazzled. Viewing it now, it seems a little cheesy, but at the time I wasn't much worried about how I sounded. I still didn't know what had just hit us, but I knew that we were still still alive, praise God. After my quick filming, I ran back to the basement and brought the kids up to the living room as things outside seemed to be settling down.

I guess pretty soon thereafter, since the windows were open I was aware that all of the neighbors had started to come out of their houses. I had been trying to call Emily and my parents, but the netword was dead. I went out front and got a good look at some of the damage down the street. There were trees down in almost every yard. Soon, Emily arrived with Allie and told me that I would have to walk to Washington School to get Rohan because there were trees and power lines down, preventing auto traffic from getting to the school. After I brought Rohan home I walked around outside for a bit taking pictures for insurance sake, not really knowing what would be needed. I found that that when Dale's tree came down, it blew through the vinyl fence, punched a hole in our roof above the sleeper porch, smashed some guttering, tore down our power service, smashed our vinyl patio fence, put some hurt on our gas grill, and busted through some lattice underneath our breakfast nook. Other than that, a window in Elena and Riddick's room broke, and some soffit and guttering came down. It all could have been much, much worse. After we got the kids settled down, I really wanted to get a way to the back door cleared, so with the cell network back up and running, I called my dad and asked him to bring over his chainsaw. While I waited for him to run the labyrinth of downed trees and closed streets, I was recruited to board up a second storey window of a neighbor who was out of town. After that job was finished, my dad had already gotten to our house, so I started in on the tree. Emily's dad showed up with a chainsaw as well and joined me in work. A little bit later, our neighbors, the Johnsons, came over and helped remove the refuse as we were cutting. Soon, we had the tree cut down to the main trunk which was across our sidewalk. What really saddens me is that it was a beautiful tulip tree, and we'll sorely miss it.

After the storm we were without power for six evenings. It was a test of mild inovations, but a healthy exercise in modern day domestic survival to be sure. Looking back, I'm rather ashamed at all of the modern conveniences that we find ourselves dependent upon, even if we're talking about hot water. For our part, we were fortunate that the gas grill was still operable, as the hood was just dented and cracked from the downed tree. We used it to cook all of our meals and to boil water on the side burner for baths. We used oil lanterns and candles for lighting at night. In the beginning, we iced most of our food down in a cooler, and also had some bags of ice thrown in the fridge and freezer for damage control. Later, after Dale's power came back on, we ran an extension cord from his house to the fridge. All in all, we lost about half of our food, so again it could have been a lot worse. Also, I had interent access through my cell phone. Our days and evenings with the kids were spent either cleaning the yard, or reading and playing board games. On that note, I will say that Rohan is the luckiest person I have ever played Monopoly against. For the record: It wasn't that much fun. I almost felt like B.B. Thorton playing the Kid in a game of checkers in Bad Santa. Also, the children lamented having to hand wash dishes, and course we felt no sympathy toward their plight. It was one of those character building moments that we parents are so fond of orchestrating. I'll admit that our patience was wearing thin by the time we finally had our power restored. We were one of the last in our neighborhood, because the rigid conduit had actually been ripped from the meter base. The power company had our line reconnected to the house the day after the storm, but it was several more days before the electrician could repair the damage on our end. Then we had to wait for the power company to come back and make the connection. I think it was the most annoying when we were still using oil lamps while the neighbors across the alley were throwing a party with loud music.

It's been a lot of work, but we were very blessed that our house was spared any major damage. I went down to New Orleans with a group from our church to help a family rebuild their home after Katrina, so I've witnessed catastrophic storm damage, and ours didn't even come close. Yet, there are some in southern Illinois that did lose their homes. My dad told me a story tonight of driving past the remains of a house trailer, seeing a guy sitting in a chair in what remained of his living room, surrounded by his possessions, just staring at the floor. So yeah, we were very blessed and fortunate. I took cold showers, ate a lot of hot dogs, burgers, and brats, suffered through pummelings from Rohan the Monopoly tycoon, got a wretched sore back from hauling tree refuse to the street, and got a ton of sleep. It wasn't much different than camping. Very, very, very fortunate indeed.

Our pwr bills would be a lot less if we went dark ages more often. Food can hold in the fridge 4 48 hrs; evry othr day hit the main beaker & pwr bill cut n hlf.

I was in the kitchen digging around for ice in the cooler when Elena joined me and said, "We can't see the ice cubes because of the darkness, right daddy?"